berries and magic.

yesterday, my dear hannah lack and i went on an adventure. it started with some blackberry thickets...and thorns...and ended with baked goodness.
We wanted to have a good day of quality time, so we drove up a backroad in Sutter Creek, walked through a dry creek and picked berries to our heart's delight. I might have slipped and landed on some blackberry vines. whatever. Then we went to my house:

We started with some good ol' fashioned wild blackberries

We mashed them up in a big pot:
And boiled them with lotssss of sugar.

Then, we filled these jars with the goods:

We boiled them for a long time, and then took them out to cool:

Oh yeah, we made this too,

And this:

The End!

rainbows and sunshiney faces

I FINALLY FINISHED MY PORTFOLIO. hallelujah. it took me long enough. sheesh.

anyways. the days keep coming, and going. i'm beginning to compulsively throw clothes on my floor on top of my backpacking backpack and writing packing lists, shopping lists, to do lists on everything.

the only thing that keeps me sane: people and nature.
especially hiking

also, ice cream. but that always keeps me sane.

upcoming events: charlie and beth go to san francisco!
RUFUS WAINWRIGHT. and sister martha.
YOSEMITE WITH THE FAMILY.

i am thoroughly excited for all of these.

i'm starting to freak out a little bit! I am leaving in...19 days.
And i have absolutely zero motivation to read qualitative researching!
I don't want to spend any of the time i have left at home in vain. I don't want it to be wasted on sleeping (well...maybe i should do that..), on silly arguments...on watching television...

i still need to pick more berries.

but anyways. more camera practice. I went to Lake Clementine with the brother, the brother's wife, and noelle! joy!
Pics:








p.s. i am cutting my hair off tomorrow. i will put up pictures.

Lost? why not stop and take some pics...

I went to visit one of the coolest people I know (Charlie Merritt) in order to preserve my sanity.
However, on the way...I apparently forgot how to get there. That's when I happened upon Lake Camanche. Lovely spot, really. Nikki and I had a chance to capture the spot where I decided to turn around. Nikki is the name for my camera until I think of a more creative one.

Let me just say: I'm extremely thankful for her. Charlie, that is. She is a beautiful example of a human being and a wonderful reminder that I am, in fact, not crazy. I've been trying to process this whole done with urban term getting ready to go to morocco thing...and it's just not very easy to do in my house. sh...don't tell.

She and i went to Lake Camanche again yesterday, on purpose this time. It was fun...and then Sookie the dog was deathly terrified of the water. Who knew?

that's all for now, kids.
maybe some deep thoughts will come after I finish this portfolio. yay. food stamps. america. the end.

today and tomorrow and yesterday.

summer reading list? photos from friends far away- come back soon. memories from times past. hopes for things ahead.
florals. travel on adventures with me. let's go. now!

the list never ends. but the sun keeps setting and rising. i hope i don't run out of time.

summer.

drop some berries in the thorns. scratches on your arms. hop a fence. iced chai. time with friends.
pick them up, mix them together. fight back tears: harsh words spoken. spices and lemon. presto.
birthday celebrations. family together, never perfect, but loving.



quaint little house. give me space to think and breathe and grow. let me walk your streets and alleyways. and make tea in your kitchen.

words of wisdom.

Don't follow please
Cause I wander aimlessly toward the lights of the city
the heat of the buildings, the sound of the sea

And the seabirds see me
And they can see three hundred thousand surrounding me
Making an island of my tongue and my bare feet

The hummingbird hides in the orange tree
While the raven is shouting his plea
And we watch from our window for someone to lead
But they're never quite what we need

The night makes it clear
That I won't fool anyone here full of my foreign fear
In the dusk light hiding I won't disappear

Love drives out fear
But fear steals from love and my scared heart has taken so much
That my arms can't hold up the weight

So there are tired dark trees that surround me
And they're growing the loneliest things
I lay in between them and try and find sleep
But the roots come up from underneath

I hide in the black earth
I hide in the seed
I hide in my sunburn
I hid incomplete

Our dreams dig deep in a rainbow
But we clothe ourselves in blue and gray
They say it's shame that is keeping us safe
But it's shame that keeps us locked away.

Joel Preston West.

why did i come home again?

I believe in the sun when it is not shining.


I believe in Love even when I feel it not.


I believe in God even when He is silent.


written on a wall in a concentration camp

written on a bookmark made by a friend.